Copland's Last Stand: A Script

Written by Puma Saysanan

INT. DENTIST'S OFFICE - DAY

A set of chairs lay in a bare room. Amidst them, a table topped with a clutter of newspapers and magazines. Sunlight shines in through the window. The air is stale, the atmosphere quiet and bleak. Pinned upon a wall is a calendar, with the date marked: 17 Feb. 2025.

COLLIN (O.S.): Collin Daniels here to see Dr. Kaplan.

Enter a tidy man, perhaps in his mid-thirties, in a collared shirt and glasses. His expression is somber, his face taut and severe as if in disapproval of all existence. He carries a plastic salad container as he marches over to the chairs. He takes a seat, setting his salad on the table.

DEREK (O.S.): Appointment for Derek Copeland.

A few minutes pass and an older, ragged man enters into a view, clothes crumpled, his face worn down by time, wrinkled by the weight of society. His eyes are gloomy, clouded in cynicism, a jaded veneer veils what might have been a kindness only gained through years of livelihood. He saunters over, holding a paper bag and takes the seat immediately next to the tidy man.

COLLIN (sneering): Out of all the seats, you had to sit next to me?

The raggedy man, DEREK, turns his head to look at the tidy man, COLLIN. His eyes are wide in shock. The expression sours in a southern twang.

DEREK (taken aback): Well, I'm sorry. I thought this was a free country. Whatcha gonna do about it?

COLLIN shakes his head and moves one seat over. DEREK pulls a sandwich out of his bag and starts bites it. The pair sit in silence for a brief moment. Eventually, COLLIN reaches out to the table and picks up a copy of the New York Post. He starts reading.

DEREK (looks over): The New York Post eh? What's a prim n' proper pony like you reading a glorified piece of "infotainment" like that?

COLLIN (glares): ...

DEREK (shrugs): Whatever. Man, kids these days.

DEREK goes back to enjoying his sandwich, which he inhales in mere seconds. He reaches out to grab a older copy of the New York Post and uses it to wipe off his hands and mouth. He crumples it up and throws it off camera. He then reaches for a copy of the Atlantic and starts reading.

DEREK: Well, I'll be! That damn president of ours just gone and fucked up again. This goddamn country is going to shit.

DEREK goes back to his paper, shaking his head as he keeps reading.

DEREK: Fucking a. Don't I just feel special being one of seventy-five thousand people bent over, getting fucked in the ass right now. At least buy me a dinner first.

COLLIN looks up from his paper and noticeably harrumphs, causing DEREK to look up from his. They stare at one another.

DEREK: Ya got a problem bud?

COLLIN: Do you mind toning the profanity down?

DEREK Yes, I do fucking mind. I'm not in the best of moods right now, man. If you didn't quite hear me, I just got fucked in the ass. The government fired the fuck out of me. So no, you can't shut me up. I'm gonna say whatever the fuck I want. Alright?

COLLIN turns back to his paper, shaking his head.

COLLIN (condescendingly): Southerners. How immature.

DEREK (perks up): What'd you say?

COLLIN breathes vocally before turning back to DEREK.

COLLIN: The harsh reality of this world is that not everyone is of equal importance. As time goes by, some gears become obsolete in the machine of bureaucracy. It's the circle of life. Be glad you were of service to our nation. At the very least, find solace in knowing that your severance serves a greater good.

DEREK: And that is?

COLLIN: Securing our nation's future. Ensuring we rise to and remain at the summit of the new world order.

DEREK (incredulous): Are you high right now? New world order? Y'know, that's what I hate about you folks. Y'all think in numbers and lofty aspirations. Don't you ever think about us? The people? The one's impacted when you delete a zero or divide by two? And when something goes wrong, it's never your fault is it? It's always the people at the bottom who gets punished for your actions. The ones who can't fight back. The helpless. You fuckers --

COLLIN (sternly): Before you criticize others, might I suggest looking in the mirror first?

He glares at DEREK.

COLLIN: Have you ever considered your own incompetence?

DEREK (confused): What's that supposed to mean?

COLLIN (weary): Look here. Just because your degree in archaeology or some thing landed you on the streets doesn't mean it's the president's fault. He didn't make you a worthless government employee.

COLLIN jabs a finger at DEREK.

COLLIN: You did.

He points to an article in the New York Post, noting a number.

COLLIN: Twenty five billion dollars. That's how much our government is going to save each year from these layoffs. The federal deficit last year was one-point-eight trillion dollars. The money we save is no where near how much we're spending. So we're going to do more trimming, more cutting. We have to eliminate all the waste in the government. Don't you understand? We have to do it so we can keep growing.

COLLIN puts down the paper. He begins gesturing.

COLLIN: Do you know what a bonsai tree is?

DEREK: Yeah, one of those little Japanese trees.

COLLIN: Yes. And in the cultivation of a bonsai tree, one must prune the stems. It keeps the tree from becoming unruly, overgrown, ungainly. Imagine the government is one large bonsai tree. Right now, it's bloated. Ungainly. There are too many limbs going every which way. And it is the mission of our president and his staff to prune this tree.

COLLIN cuts the air with his hand.

COLLIN: And the truth of the matter is, you are one of these limbs. You are just another wayward branch in the tangle that had to be removed. You had to go so the nation could grow. There is no reason for anger. Your sacrifice was for the greater good.

DEREK is taken aback. He smolders in his seat before huffing, puffing and replying to COLLIN's comment.

DEREK (outraged): Again with the greater good bullshit. And "my sacrifice"? What a load of crap.

He points at COLLIN.

DEREK: You're a cold, heartless man with your head so far stuck up your ass. You claim to know me, my ins and outs. Calling me incompetent and worthless.

DEREK shakes his head.

DEREK (livid): Well, son, you don't know shit about me! I'll have you know I was a USDA employee and a fucking veteran at that before your glorious president fucked me over along with ten thousand other workers by laying us off.

His anger grows.

DEREK (incensed): I protected this nation. I fought to keep weapons and drugs out of the country while you were still trying to get laid in college. And what did I get in return? One of those fucking, AI, croc-shit, dumb ass, form letters. You wanna know what they told me? Wanna see that email? Let me read it to ya.

DEREK pulls out his phone, scrolling to find the email. He shows it to COLLIN.

DEREK: "You have not demonstrated that your further employment at the Agency would be in the public interest."

DEREK shakes the phone up high in outcry.

DEREK: Public interest my ass! I trained dogs, handlers, all sorts of fucking animals to catch all kinds of illegal agricultural shit that shouldn't enter our borders.

He points to COLLIN's salad.

DEREK: Your salad there, son. The lettuce, the cheese, the chicken. It's all regulated by the USDA. Protected by people like me. By people now gone. So next time you buy one of your fancy salads and find it costs too much or they don't make your favorite dressing anymore. Well, you only got yourself to blame. You're a fucking imbecile, you know that? Too concerned with your fantasies that you forget about the present. About real life. About real people.

He sits down in the chair next to COLLIN. DEREK looks COLLIN in the eyes. They stare down one another until COLLIN looks away.

DEREK (wearily, yet still irritated): I gave blood, sweat, and tears to this country for 20 years to continue service to the government, doing what I was trained to do by them. He throws down his paper in resignation.

His hands empty, he gestures cynically.

DEREK: And how do they reward me? By firing me 11 days before my probationary period ended.

He looks around, taking in the aged air.

DEREK: I tell you what, son. This country is going to shit. Immigrants are scared for their lives. Women fear for their bodies. Comfortably employed people have to always be looking out for new jobs. And you have the audacity to say it's all for a greater good? All of this for America to be more powerful?

He refocuses on COLLIN now, whose head is down and refusing to make eye contact with DEREK.

DEREK: (frustrated) If the people are unhappy, what good is power? If your citizens are treated like this, who will fight for your nation? Who will remain at the end of the day? Ask yourself that. Cause this is a nation by the people, for the people, of the people. And if there aren't any people left -- is it even a nation?

DEREK exits. COLLIN is left alone, ruminating on the conversation.

RECEPTIONIST (O.S.): Mr. Copeland? Dr. Williams will see you now.

THE END